1. My insecurities have a long-standing relationship with my personality. They navigate me better than I ever could. So understand that I have been trying to break them up for a long time, and they occasionally pull me back in like a lover that won’t stay away.
  2. Don’t add qualifiers to compliments. If you think I’m cute/pretty/beautiful, don’t add “for a big girl” at the end of your statement. It’s rude and unacceptable if you want to flatter me.
  3. I already know I’m fat, but I still have fat days where everything I wear makes me look terrible. I just need a little reassurance that I’m still pretty even when I feel like shit.
  4. If you like me enough to lay with me, then you should be able to show me off in public. Just because I’m a big girl doesn’t mean I’m your little secret.
  5. Big girls are not put on this earth to serve you, so don’t act like you are God’s gift to us by giving us some attention. Honey, I know I look good, and if I’m not interested that doesn’t make me a “stuck up fat bitch” or any other variation of the phrase.
  6. No, big girls are not jolly like Santa Claus. I have emotions, attitude, and opinions you will not agree with, and I will not be so submissive as to not speak my mind. And no I don’t have to be happy all the time because I’m round. Those attributes are not synonymous and if you aren’t ready for that, please keep moving.
  7. I am not a fetish. Do not approach me with the intention of fulfilling a fantasy or secret desire of yours. I am not the one, and you need to get over yourself as a man.
  8. Don’t think of me as an ATM with low self-esteem. I trick money off on people I know are loyal to me and I know have my back. I don’t need to buy your time, because I can find someone better that appreciates me for me not what I buy them.
  9. I want to feel appreciated, so even when you have me, act like you don’t. I am a queen waiting for a king. I will give you the benefits of being a king if you treat me like a queen. Don’t ever forget that.
  10. Just love me the way you want to be loved. No big secret or revelation, if you wouldn’t want to be treated a certain way, don’t treat me that way.

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